All Relationships Welcome
Relationship Counseling
While romantic relationships are the most common that seek counseling, we can help with any type of connection: friendships, sibling, parent-child, family, etc.
When it comes to romantic relationships, even though we work with all of them, our emphasis is on ethical non-monogamy (ENM) as these relationships are often misunderstood and stigmatized. Catalyzing Courage is a place that takes pride in giving ENM people a place to land safely and get the help they desire without having to explain all the nuances of their worldview.
If you are uncertain about what relationship is right for you or need more general information about ENM, check that out below.
Monogamy vs. Ethical Non-Monogamy
Monogamy and ethical non-monogamy are two different relationship styles that have different sets of rules and expectations. Monogamy is the practice of having one romantic or sexual partner at a time. Ethical non-monogamy is the practice of having multiple romantic or sexual partners with the knowledge and consent of all involved.
Definitions
Monogamy is defined as the practice of having one romantic or sexual partner at a time. This means that partners in a monogamous relationship are expected to be faithful to each other and not engage in sexual or romantic relationships with other people.
Ethical non-monogamy is defined as the practice of having multiple romantic or sexual partners with the knowledge and consent of all involved. This means that partners in an ethical non-monogamous relationship are free to pursue other relationships, but they must be honest and open with their partners about their activities.
Key Principles
The key principles of monogamy are fidelity, trust, and commitment. Partners in a monogamous relationship are expected to be faithful to each other, to trust each other, and to be committed to their relationship.
The key principles of ethical non-monogamy are communication, honesty, and respect. Partners in an ethical non-monogamous relationship are expected to communicate openly with each other about their desires and needs, to be honest about their activities with other partners, and to respect each other's boundaries.
Benefits
The benefits of monogamy include a sense of security, stability, and intimacy. Partners in a monogamous relationship can feel secure in the knowledge that their partner is committed to them and that they are the only one their partner is sexually or romantically involved with. Monogamy can also provide a sense of consistency and predictability in a relationship.
The benefits of ethical non-monogamy include increased freedom, flexibility, and variety. Partners in an ethical non-monogamous relationship can have multiple partners, which can allow them to explore their sexuality and meet new people. Ethical non-monogamy can also provide a sense of autonomy, as partners are not limited to one person nor a specific type of relationship.
Challenges
The challenges of monogamy include jealousy, insecurity, and boredom. Partners in a monogamous relationship may experience jealousy if their partner is spending time with someone else. They may also feel insecure if they are not sure if their partner is still attracted to them. Monogamy can also become boring if partners are not able to explore their sexuality or meet new people.
The challenges of ethical non-monogamy include communication, conflict resolution, and managing multiple relationships. Partners in an ethical non-monogamous relationship must be able to communicate effectively with each other about their desires and needs. They must also be able to resolve conflict in a healthy way. Ethical non-monogamy can also be challenging to manage, as partners must keep track of multiple relationships and make sure that they are not neglecting any of their partners.
Popularity
Monogamy is the more popular relationship style, as it is the norm in most cultures. Ethical non-monogamy is less popular, but it is becoming more accepted as people become more open-minded about different relationship styles.
Our Thoughts
There is no right or wrong way of being in relationship. It comes down to what feels right for you. Some people crave more variety and complexity in their relationships, while others prefer the security and comfort of not having to juggle multiple close romantic relationships. At Catalyzing Courage, we can help you walk toward health regardless of the relationship.
Types of Ethical Non-Monogamy
Polyamory: This is a relationship structure in which people have multiple romantic and/or sexual partners with the knowledge and consent of all involved. Polyamory can take many different forms, such as hierarchical polyamory, where some partners are considered to be more important than others, or non-hierarchical polyamory, where all partners are considered to be equal.
Open relationships: This is a relationship structure in which people are free to have sexual or romantic relationships with other people, but they still maintain a primary relationship with their partner. Open relationships can be either monogamous or non-monogamous, and they can vary in terms of how much communication and disclosure is expected between partners.
Swinging: This is a type of non-monogamy in which couples or individuals engage in sexual activity with other couples or individuals, but they do not have romantic relationships with them. Swinging can be either one-on-one or group-based, and it can be either casual or more regular.
Polyfidelity: This is a type of non-monogamy in which a group of people agree to be sexually and/or romantically involved only with each other. Polyfidelity groups can be either closed, meaning that no new members are allowed, or open, meaning that new members may be added with the consent of all existing members.
Casual dating: This is a type of non-monogamy in which people date multiple people without the expectation of a long-term commitment. Casual dating can be either sexual or non-sexual, and it can be either short-term or long-term.
Solo polyamory: This is a type of polyamory in which one person has multiple romantic and/or sexual partners, but they do not live with any of their partners. Solo polyamorists often value their independence and autonomy, and they may choose to practice solo polyamory because they do not want to be in a traditional relationship structure.
Kitchen table polyamory: This is a type of polyamory in which all partners know each other and are comfortable socializing together. Kitchen table polyamorists often value communication and transparency, and they may choose to practice kitchen table polyamory because they believe that it helps to strengthen their relationships.
Parallel polyamory: This is a type of polyamory in which partners do not generally interact with or talk about their other partner(s). This can be on a spectrum as some may not even want to know about other relationships. This is preferred by some as a means of having to engage less with the emotional weight of knowing about the other relationships.
V polyamory: This is a type of polyamory in which one person has two or more partners, and all of the partners are aware of each other and have some level of interaction. V polyamory can be either hierarchical or non-hierarchical, and it can vary in terms of how much time and energy each partner spends with the other partners.
Triad: This is a type of polyamory in which three people are all in a romantic relationship with each other. Triads can be either hierarchical or non-hierarchical, and they can vary in terms of how much time and energy each partner spends with the other partners.
Quad: This is a type of polyamory in which four people are all in a romantic relationship with each other. Quads can be either hierarchical or non-hierarchical, and they can vary in terms of how much time and energy each partner spends with the other partners.
Polycule: This is a term used to describe a network of people who are all in some kind of romantic or sexual relationship with each other. Polycules can be any size, and they can be either hierarchical or non-hierarchical.
Relationship Anarchy: People with this identity choose to not have any predetermined label for any of their relationships. Platonic, romantic, or somewhere in between does not dictate the value or investment of the relationship. This style is inherently non-hierarchical as each relationship has its own potentiality to become anything. All relationships are considered fluid as they can evolve and change.
These are just a few of the many different types of ethical non-monogamy. It is important to note that these are just labels, and people may choose to practice ethical non-monogamy in ways that do not fit neatly into any of these categories. The most important thing is to find a relationship style that works for you and your partners.