Polyamory: What It Is and How to Do It Ethically
RELATIONSHIPS
Polyamory is a relationship structure in which people are open to having multiple romantic and/or sexual partners, with the knowledge and consent of all partners involved. It is a complex and nuanced relationship style, and there is no one right way to do it. However, there are some basic principles that can help you build healthy and ethical polyamorous relationships.
What is Polyamory?
The word "polyamory" comes from the Greek words "poly" (many) and "amor" (love). It literally means "many loves." However, polyamory is not just about having multiple partners. It is also about having multiple relationships that are based on love, honesty, and respect.
Polyamory is not for everyone. It requires a lot of communication, trust, and emotional maturity. If you are not comfortable with the idea of your partner having other partners, then polyamory is not for you.
How to Do Polyamory Ethically
If you are considering polyamory, there are some basic principles that you should follow in order to do it ethically:
Communicate openly and honestly with your partners. This means being clear about your expectations, your needs, and your boundaries. It also means being honest about your feelings, even if they are difficult to talk about.
Be respectful of your partners' other relationships. This means not trying to compete with your partners' other partners, and not trying to control your partners' time or attention.
Be honest about your intentions. If you are not sure if you are ready for polyamory, be honest with your partners about that. Don't lead them on or make promises that you can't keep.
Be prepared to deal with jealousy. Jealousy is a normal emotion, but it can be destructive if projected at your partner in polyamorous relationships. If you are struggling with jealousy, talk to your partners about it. They can help you to understand your jealousy and to develop healthy coping mechanisms.
Conclusion
Polyamory is a complex and nuanced relationship style, but it can be a rewarding one. If you are considering polyamory, be sure to do your research and to talk to other polyamorous people. They can help you to understand what polyamory is all about and to decide if it is right for you.
Resources
More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Polyamory by Franklin Veaux and Eve Rickert
The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities by Janet Hardy and Dossie Easton
Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, and Consensual Nonmonogamy by Jessica Fern
Polyamory in the 21st Century: Love and Intimacy Beyond Monogamy by Tristan Taormino
The Polyamory Toolkit by The Polyamorous Education Network